Why do men leave relationships? One reason that happens a lot can be called projection. They project their negative feelings onto their mate. So, if a man wakes up feeling bad one morning, feeling empty or sad for “no reason,” he will tend to project this feeling onto his partner: I am not happy, I must be losing the passion for her. Instead of owning his own negative feelings and unhappiness, he will tend to blame it on his mate.
“I feel empty and a loss of passion. It must be her, she isn’t as loving as she used to be!” Projection is that simple and happens that easily.
So then he starts in on his girlfriend. “Why do you work so much? Why don’t you work less and start going to the gym? Why don’t you spend more time working on your appearance?”
Projection occurs in a thousand different ways and levels, many not nearly so obvious as this. And projection occurs in part because we have not been well trained in our society to own and acknowledge our feelings. One of the most common causes of relationships breaking up is projection.
So why do men leave? As an example, Jim has been feeling a lot of emptiness and ennui lately. This is normal and happens to all of us from time to time, we will feel empty. But rather than own and work with his own feelings, he starts thinking “I am unhappy, I must be falling out of love.”
Sure, Jim could start to take responsibility for his feelings rather than blame Janey for his unhappiness. But we were never taught how to do this. We all seem to think if you feel bad you need to change something outside, like get a better car, or job, or lover.
We all have what can be called a “Shadow Side” of the Self. This is a part of our psyche where we store feelings that we can’t own. Like anger, or sadness, or hate, or fear. We tell the world we are feeling fine, while we walk around with a whole shadow side that is suppressed. So a man will be happy one moment, then stub his toe and “lose control,” screaming and swearing and ranting. This is just the shadow side being expressed!
So why do men leave? Often it is because of projection. They project their unhappiness onto you. Can you get your ex back if this has happened? It is difficult, and it may take a while, but in some cases it can be done.
You can get a free course on How To Get Your Ex Back In Just Hours at Get Ex Back Now. Joanie S Angel teaches relationship and emotional intelligence courses and you can get more about the steps to getting your ex back here at 3 Simple Steps To Get Your Ex Back .
